Tuesday, September 24, 2002
school, meh.
school had an odd feeling yesterday. i was treating it as something entirely unimportant. it was kind of like going to work on days that i really have nothing to do, something i just kind of do out of habit and necessity. hopefully i can keep this up, it worked pretty well. it was just strange to see the contrast between my attitude today, my attitude in the past, and everyone elses attitude around me. it was fall quarter, so for a bunch of people, this was their first day. you could spot these people pretty easily, wandering around, shaking in nervous anticipation, looking around with frantic looks on their faces with parents close behind trying to give suggestions and calm their children down. i remember how much that sucked. usually on first days in the past, i have been nervous like this. but yesterday i wasn't. it was just kind of like, oh well, i'm at school. there really wasn't much i could do about it, so i adopted my indifferent attitude and did what i had too.
it made me realize how much ahead i am of pretty much everyone else there. it is giving me kind of a sense of confidence that i never really applied to school. for the most part, i'm more experienced both in life and in school and intelligent in the book sense and in common sense. i am better than pretty much everyone there in one way or another. i look older, feel older, act older, and am older than most of the people there. i don't care about all the social bullshit that is going on, and there is no way i can get sucked into it. before when i've gone, i looked like a young college student, so all the jerkoffs treated me accordingly. now the jerkoffs avoid me because they know i own them anyways. it is strange
in other news, a few minutes ago i super glued my hand to my shoe. it kind of brings everything into perspective....
school had an odd feeling yesterday. i was treating it as something entirely unimportant. it was kind of like going to work on days that i really have nothing to do, something i just kind of do out of habit and necessity. hopefully i can keep this up, it worked pretty well. it was just strange to see the contrast between my attitude today, my attitude in the past, and everyone elses attitude around me. it was fall quarter, so for a bunch of people, this was their first day. you could spot these people pretty easily, wandering around, shaking in nervous anticipation, looking around with frantic looks on their faces with parents close behind trying to give suggestions and calm their children down. i remember how much that sucked. usually on first days in the past, i have been nervous like this. but yesterday i wasn't. it was just kind of like, oh well, i'm at school. there really wasn't much i could do about it, so i adopted my indifferent attitude and did what i had too.
it made me realize how much ahead i am of pretty much everyone else there. it is giving me kind of a sense of confidence that i never really applied to school. for the most part, i'm more experienced both in life and in school and intelligent in the book sense and in common sense. i am better than pretty much everyone there in one way or another. i look older, feel older, act older, and am older than most of the people there. i don't care about all the social bullshit that is going on, and there is no way i can get sucked into it. before when i've gone, i looked like a young college student, so all the jerkoffs treated me accordingly. now the jerkoffs avoid me because they know i own them anyways. it is strange
in other news, a few minutes ago i super glued my hand to my shoe. it kind of brings everything into perspective....
